Time Management 101

The new year is a perfect time to think about how to make the next year better than the last. So what would I do if I walked the walk? How can you survive a deployment or other separation, or just plain old life?

Have a plan-have at least a basic idea of what you want to get done.
Have a back-up plan- because let's face it, how often is life smooth enough for the first plan to work? For example, I want to get the laundry done, all our school subjects and mop the floors before dinner. Back-up plan: wash whites and sweep floor, aim for reading, writing and math. Then later, maybe kids can do history and science while I mop.

Accept help- when people know you are working short handed they always offer to help. But usually it is in a generic "If you need something, call." format. I suggest you do just that. Call. Sometime you just have to be humble enough to know you need help. Maybe you can share car pool duties or have a kid visit the neighbors for an hour so you can concentrate on paying bills. Don't think you have to be Supermom. You don't get more gold stars for surviving alone.

Don't Run on dead batteries. You don't expect your phone to work when the battery is dead, right? How can you be both mom and dad if you are beat? Take the few precious minutes you can scrape up and un-apologetically do something to bolster yourself. Pray, exercise, take a hot bath, whatever helps you find your center again.

Reduce, Reuse, Recycle. No I'm not discussing the garbage here. Reduce all extra commitment and activities possible. While you are down to just one, don't try and do everything you did as a pair. Streamline the social clutter and you won't be stretched so thin that changes bring mayhem. Re-use your resources in creative ways. Mom shouldn't be the only one in the family doing more. Maybe sons can do more household chores like washing cars or weeding. Even young toddlers can be taught to match socks. If they aren't great at it at least they are happy and safe playing the matching game while you fold laundry. Recycle your energy as much as possible. Strive to not waste time or energy unless it something your family really prioritizes. This is not the time to take up new hobbies or start new volunteer time.

Laugh. Learn to see the humor in any situation. It beats crying when things go wrong. Call a friend and have a chuckle about the newest issues and you'll feel better and gain more perspective on how to best tackle the challenges.

Line up your ducks- while it is never possible to anticipate every contingency there is no reason not to take care of the obvious ones. If your finances are straight, your wills are current, powers of attorney are drawn up, house, car, and family maintenance is up to date, you greatly reduce the odds of disaster striking. If it does, at least you will be in the best position to cope.

Finally, remember that this situation is temporary. Every member of the family is experiencing stress and anxiety to different degrees. Extend each other the grace to be patient and hep each other as much as possible. With Him, all things are possible.